There’s a beautiful thing about honesty, but we fear it so much. Being 💯 honest with what I really want out of life scares the crap out of me, but when 2018 arrived, I realized, in order to make one of my 2018 goals actualize I had to be honest. The goal was to surround myself around all that makes me happy. But, that meant being honest about what makes me happy and unhappy. A goal like that forces you to look within, because you can’t base your happiness on what your family/friends like and who you follow. DUH! Happiness is subjective – individual, personal, and intuitive. For me it’s a good laugh, listening and dancing to a good song (shared a January playlist if ya’ll want some happy tunes), as well as surrounding myself around inspiring and motivated people. Finding out what makes you happy and unhappy takes facing that scary 7 letter word: honesty.
My Dad always told me “The truth will set you free” (John 8:32) and it’s the truth. You know that sense of relief and freedom when a relationship that wasn’t serving you anymore ends. How about the relief you feel when you tell your best friend that you’d rather Netflix and mask, rather than a boozy girl’s night out? I believe honesty (big or small) can help you lead your best life. Pharell also says “The truth will set you free” in the intro of his new Lemon song and follows with “but at first it will piss you off.” And, that’s so true too. The truth will piss you off, because being honest means stepping outside your comfort zone. Doing what’s right means facing the fear of the unknown. The possibilities are daunting, but you have to muster up the courage and be honest. It’s the hardest thing to do, but that’s where the beauty of life happens.
The fear of honesty comes in so many forms, but there is so much beauty when you embrace it. Being honest, could be as big as admitting your #metoo experience, chasing after your dreams, or as small as garnering enough courage to wear an outfit you honestly really want to wear (like the vinyl pants I’m wearing in this outfit post).
I believe being honest in smaller situations can really help us be honest when bigger situations arise. Honesty, helps us live our best lives, and is helping me live a happy life. I broke down 3 situations, where honesty is helping me be happy.
- You Need Honest about your Dreams and Goals
I went to Graduate School at USC. I have a Master’s degree in Communication Management. It could help me lead marketing and communication fields in corporate businesses as well as my favorite fashion companies. After I got my degrees (Undergrad + Graduate), I pressured myself that I should go after those corporate jobs and have a reliable job like many people my age. I hated feeling like I had to do something, because everyone else was doing it. I’ve always been an entrepreneur at heart and a couple months ago I had to be honest with myself and decide if I was going to pursue IMLVH 💯 or not. I am, but it’s not easy. I get joy from sharing my personal style, thoughts, and love for easy beauty with you babes. I don’t make a lot of money (yet), but one DM from a babe that shared I inspired and encouraged them makes me so unbelievably happy. I had to be honest with myself and decide what was right for me and right now it’s pursuing IMLVH. I’m passionate about inspiring and encouraging you babes to do and be your best, but it took a lot of honesty with myself. I had to stop comparing myself to other babes my age, even other influencers and trust that if it truly made me happy I needed to pursue it. Maybe you don’t have major dreams and goals yet, but start being honest about what you like and don’t like and see where it leads you.
2. You need to stop fearing Honesty in Dating
I met someone on bumble and we chatted for a couple weeks before we met. We had tacos, margaritas, and he was super cute. I was hoping for a second date, but heard nothing. I got ghosted 👻. The classic it’s too hard for me to be honest and tell this person that I’m not interested. I’m guilty of it, but it sucks when it happens to you. Not being honest and simply telling someone you’re not feeling it does more harm than good. I get it, he wasn’t into me, but letting a person know that is so important. When you like someone it’s science and almost magic. So, you can’t force liking someone, so you have to tell the person you’re not feeling it, that there is no vibe. You save the person from wasting valuable time thinking about you and a future together. I wasted my time on plenty of guys, wondering why I wasn’t getting a text, but in hindsight good looks, flirty margarita talk and good food doesn’t mean shit.
It would have totally pissed me off if he told me he wasn’t interested, but at least I’d known the truth and not wondered what was wrong with me and what I needed to fix. I doubted everything about me, because dudes didn’t have the guts to tell me they just didn’t vibe with me. But, time healed me and that’s when I realized the universe and science has a lot to do with dating. Honestly, telling someone how you really feel, is really hard, because you don’t want to hurt their feelings, but it’s helpful to us all.. They’ll be annoyed or pissed off, but they’ll get over it and meet someone else.
So, next time you’re not into someone, find the the courage to be honest and simply say, “I had a good time, but I just don’t feel it romantically with you..” It’s simple, to the point, and you might bum them out, but you can’t feel responsible for something out of your control. One thing about dating that we don’t own up to is that dating is it’s more than just good looks and good tacos. It also takes honesty, time, and the planets aligning.
3. And, honestly, just wear what you want.
Why do we stop ourselves from buying or wearing something we really want? I get the cost of something can be an issue, but save for it. For the longest time I admired and wanted the Gucci Princetown slides, black vinyl pants, and a brown faux fur jacket, but stopped myself. All so bougie and 2/3 are not practical for the so-cal weather I experience, but I honestly really liked each piece. I finally got the courage to buy them. 2018 is about embracing all that makes me happy and getting those pieces made me happy. That should be a major rule of thumb when we shop and get ready in the morning. If you wear something that brings a smile to your face, buy it – if you can. I find being honest with yourself and what you want to wear truly builds your confidence and encourages you to embrace who you are. I don’t get why we sabotage ourselves from what we really want. I did it all the time, until I started to pursue blogging full time. I’ve learned through my blogging journey, when I have the guts to try something a little crazy my style evolves and becomes more and more me. Plus, the pep in my step when I rock my Gucci slides makes me happy. Not because they’re Gucci, but because I genuinely wanted them and I worked for them. Being honest about what we love helps us vibrate on high and positive level. Wearing what truly makes you happy helps you tap into your true self and I think that’s so important in life. So, next time you see something you honestly love, buy it and rock it.
I hope I’ve inspired you be honest. It is an important to living our best life. We need stop fearing what we want and be honest about what brings us happiness. When we are honest with ourselves, others, and have the guts to do what we truly want, we grow, evolve and become our best selves. I don’t think I’m truly my best self, yet, but I’m getting there. So, lets be honest with ourselves and face your truth (what we want), because there’s a beautiful thing that follows – happiness.